Searching... Running

Give me grace and chemicals, I wanna run into them.... Such a great song, such a great chorus, so small so powerful, yet so simple, so small.... In these small things I've come to find peace as of lately, in some tough times once again, in the rollercoaster we call life.

What's going on? what's happening? I keep asking myself, while my chest keeps being pressured more and more. It's a very weird feeling, a very strange sensations that I've never had before, that I've never experienced before for such a long span, only in small doses when a new situation arose, or something big was about to happen... Is that it? something big is about to be... Who knows... All I know is that I'm sitting here, having the same feelings, and thinking the same thoughts I had during that long year and a half where everything was black, everything was slow, and everything came at the wrong time...

Everything mixed up with a nervousness created by the fact that this is the worst season of my career so far, in every aspect... Maybe I had to many expectations, too high, or too demanding. Or maybe I had an idea, or a plan that never went through, and now I cant, nor I know how to recalculate my route... Like I said before, it's time to start form scratch, to go back to the basics, and re-do everything from the begining, from the very very begining... Am I ready?

Let me just run into those flowers....