Opportunity + Decision + Faith = ¿¿¿¿????

What’s the formula? What’s the mathematical rule that can give me an answer, a solution for me? Now that I know what’s coming in, who most likely will be in charge, doubt assaults me. My heart has never been filled with so many questions, so many question marks. Some moments I know I want it, some I know I don’t want it. I look back and think for a second that I have been here before, but before she wasn’t in the balance, love wasn’t part of the deal as heavy as it is now. Here I am, with a basketball dream ready to start becoming a reality (more than it has been) in one hand; and a college degree, with a life with my baby, starting our life together in the other. In the middle, there’s me, a confused man, in whose inside lays a little boy, growing up, making decisions with the most care and the greatest misunderstanding at times, learning from mistakes from the past, now and the future. These past couple of days have give me so much time to think, to process things, that I could be typing here for never ending lines, trying to put my thoughts together. The “what if’s” keep bombarding my head, constantly, every second, and it hasn’t even happened yet, I haven’t even left yet… What Samir? What? What? What? ¿¿¿¿¿¿¿??????